My MIL keeps asking us what fun things we’re going to do while I’m out in SLC. It’s not clear to either of us that she remembers that we’re here to empty out her house, and neither of us knows the way to remind her without breaking her heart.
Which instead breaks ours.
I am out in Salt Lake to work, but, this is also my vacation, so today we made sure was a day mostly dedicated to the latter. We checked out a new coffee shop, bought a ton of stuff at rhe farmers market, took a nap, bought new jeans, and ate pizza.
And I spent more time outside than in probably the last month combined enjoying a gorgeously sunny day.
I made it to Salt Lake just after midnight local time.
The new airport terminal is not made for someone low in sleep or mental reserves. I had to walk at least a mile from gate to get to the car. (Rudi made it the ten minutes from the air b-n-b to the airport before I got out of the building.) I’m sure it’s lovely in the daylight, while you’re waiting for a flight, getting to see the sun set over the Wasatch front. I look forward to experiencing it that way.
But the empanada I had from a new-to-us Venezuelan restaurant for a late supper was excellent — and weighed about a pound. (There’s a second one in the fridge.) I can see why there was a line.
We’re going to start the day with a trip to a farmers market and then either head over to the house to assess or to see Rudi’s mom.
Have a good Saturday!
Three beautiful things from my past week:
1. A coworker and I surprised a young woman who’s reported to us both by making donations to support her half marathon charitable cause.
2. Getting to spend the night of my dad’s birthday with him and my mom. This was the first in-person family birthday celebration since COVID began.
3. I ran into a former colleague as I was running an errand. Since leaving the company, she’s moved to my neighborhood.
How about you? What’s been beautiful in your world lately?
Honestly, my decision-making abilities have been down the toilet for a while. Sometimes I know I’m making a questionable decision, but the thought of having to prolong it outweighs the smarter voice. And sometimes I’m so caught in the mental vortex of trying to do too much with too few reserves that I’m literally going in circles from one task to another, without ever actually getting any of it done. I understand that sitting down and tackling one thing at a time is the smarter decision, but I don’t have the ability anymore to distinguish which thing needs focus until we’re in a danger zone.
I keep putting one foot in front of another, which counts for something, but honestly it counts for less and less every day. Can I call out exhausted for the rest of the year?
I need to refill my emotional and mental coffers, but the trip to Salt Lake doesn’t really seem likely to offer that. And I’m starting to wonder if this is just going to be life from now on, with nothing ever being great again. (To be fair, nothing is horrific either. Everyone is healthy and safe and I realize how lucky I am that I’m starting from that baseline.). I know everyone is struggling and my situation is neither unique nor interesting, but without getting some prolonged space and energy to recharge, I just don’t see how to keep the daily grind from grinding me up, too.
Rudi heads to Salt Lake tomorrow afternoon, and I’ll join him Friday night. His mom suddenly moved into assisted living earlier this year, and he’s been working on getting her house emptied out so it can be sold. We’re hoping the next few weeks are the final push in this process, and I’ll go put in my work detail for a week. But before I do, I have a few things I need to wrap up here:
I guess I’ve got my marching orders for the next few days…