{"id":908,"date":"2008-01-08T11:33:43","date_gmt":"2008-01-08T16:33:43","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.spritewrites.net\/?p=908"},"modified":"2008-01-08T11:33:43","modified_gmt":"2008-01-08T16:33:43","slug":"how-not-to-start-your-morning","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.spritewrites.net\/?p=908","title":{"rendered":"how not to start your morning"},"content":{"rendered":"

So you’re running late for work<\/p>\n

and you’re in the bathroom washing your face, putting in your contacts, and brushing your hair and teeth<\/p>\n

and you got soap in your eyes<\/p>\n

so putting in your contacts is not going as smoothly as normal<\/p>\n

when through the haze of your blurry vision<\/p>\n

you see,<\/p>\n

poking through one of the holes of the toothbrush holder,<\/p>\n

…<\/p>\n

ANTENNAE<\/p>\n

!!!!!!!!!!!!<\/p>\n

Gah!<\/p>\n

::Shudder!!!::<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

So you’re running late for work and you’re in the bathroom washing your face, putting in your contacts, and brushing your hair and teeth and you got soap in your eyes so putting in your contacts is not going as smoothly as normal when through the haze of your blurry vision you see, poking through […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[15],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-908","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-life-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\nhow not to start your morning - sprite writes<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.spritewrites.net\/?p=908\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"how not to start your morning - 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